Tuesday, August 18, 2009

I Finally Did IT!!


For those of you who have been following my blog entries over many years, you may be able to recall my blog entry entitled Resilience of the Ice Age Squirrel; how I struggled to keep my courage around me when the obstacles I was facing seemed insurmountable.

Going back to school, paying my own way through university fees while working creatively at earning enough just to keep food on the table and the family afloat was no easy task. Each day I beseeched God for strength and stamina of the soul and mind. He was the only place I lay my head down to cry my heart out and to rest my weary bones. He was the only one who would really hear what was uttered in my heart.

And when I finally succeeded in getting myself qualified to do my Master's Degree, I struggled with my grey matters. I poured out my frustration in my blog entry What's My Name Again?I even questioned my decision to further my studies in the ensuing entry entitled As Time Goes By.

During my academic journey, i discovered a few things about myself which was very enlightening and became my north star and this was mentioned in To Be The Best.

2008 began with the passing of my soul brother. I spent the whole year and a month just struggling to overcome grief. The worst crunch inspired me to write Along The Way.Tears of grief streamed like a river in the rain. Visible but ignored.

When I could apply my knowledge in my healing process, I shared it with my readers in Goodbye 2008. But even that wasn't a sure thing. Early 2009, I found myself still struggling with the loss of Mad in my life. I guess knowledge I had was not enough to heal myself. I knew I needed to keep on going. And I did. Until I found a book that was like light at the end of the tunnel. Doing What I Can Do was the entry I wrote to share the knowledge I learned from a book that my mom bought for me as a birthday gift. Alhamdulillah, through that book, Allah guided me back to emotional balance and psychological stability. I really thought I was gonna lose it.

Today was my graduation day. I finally made it! Walking up on stage to receive my scroll with my family watching in the audience was the biggest moment of my entire life. 30 years ago, I would never envisioned myself being a University graduate. Now I am a Masters degree holder. And no one can take that away from me. I have finally become ME. I am ready to move on and soar to the sky... embracing the limitless....

1 comment:

azuar said...

congratulations! you did it..i had no doubt whatsoever.. you found your niche..kita kan late bloomers... next step i think you should have a talk show of your own! - talk about anything & everything that's close to your heart.. opportunities are plenty as we now have many tv stations you can approach... what say u? ada brani? :-)