Monday, May 24, 2010
As I type this opening line, I let out a huge sigh of relief laced with gratitude for surviving the tremendous ordeal I had been through over the past few years. I no longer suffer pain of any sort. I no longer have anxiety or depression which I had endured for many months prior to this blessing from Allah. I am now able to perform my prayers again without any hindrance. It is indeed a blessed privilege to be able to pray. Very few people understand the depth of my thankfulness for this.
I can feel the change in me. I am still me but no longer the same. I have been restored to who I was before, and more. I don't know how to articulate this feeling I have in words. I have been healed. I have been touched by Him and feel truly humbled by His love. I have changed. I have evolved. I have moved on. I shall live the remaining days of my life in happiness and gratitude.
To those who were there by my side during my darkest hours, I pray for Allah to bless you with the same amount of kindness and patience you have shown me. To those who had a part in being the cause of my sorrow and agony, I wish you happiness and contentment. May you find someone else to be made a the center of your universe. I feel no pity for you. My heart is no longer capable to feel anything but hatred for your behavior and actions. You will destroy yourselves by your own poison.
Dear Allah All Mighty and Most Loving, thank you for putting me through that ordeal in order for me to restore my faith. I would never wish away even a single iota of pain that had been allowed to befall me for I am so happy and contented to be where I am today. You have allowed me to hit rock bottom with such impact that has rocketed me to the height of bliss I am feeling now. I see clearly now the true colours of your creatures and the Truth of You. Alhamdulillah. Allahu Akbar.
In the end, I return to You.
Monday, May 3, 2010
Have you not heard the words of the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) as they have come down to us in the tradition: "There will be groups of people who will surely be wishing, on the Day of Resurrection, that their flesh might be cut away with scissors, in view of the reward they see given to those who have borne misfortune."
Your neighbour will therefore come to wish he had been in your place in this world, in view of the lengthy reckoning and interrogation he must undergo, and his having to stand in the heat of the sun for fifty thousand years at the Resurrection, on account of the comfort he enjoyed in this world, while you are at a distance from all this, in the shade of the Throne, eating and drinking, enjoying yourself, cheerful, happy and relaxed, on account of your patient endurance of worldly hardships, constraints, troubles, suffering and poverty, your contentment and readiness to comply with your Lord (Almighty and Glorious is He) when His plan and decision meant poverty for you and affluence for others, sickness for you and good health for others, hardship for you and ease for others, humiliation for you and honor for others. May Allah include us, and you, among those who bear misfortune with patience, who give thanks for blessings, and who entrust their affairs to the Lord of heaven!
- from Thirty-seventh Discourse, Revelations of The Unseen by Shaikh 'Abd Al-Qadir Al-Jilani.